Wednesday, July 17, 2013

The End of Integration?


I run through tickling rain to catch a bus from the department capital to my site. As I enter the yellow cave, transported from the nation of my birth, the thick heat of foreign bodies cramming the aisle cuts my relief to be dry. The thought of spending an hour and a half bobbing through sweat, bags of fried plantain and chicken makes me yearn to retreat to the raindrops’ earlier gnaw. The sudden tap of a hand against my thigh ushers relief.  Without looking, my body has been culturally conditioned to recognize that this touch signals the offering of an unoccupied seat.
I settle into my highly desired accommodation, shoot an awkward smile of appreciation to my neighbor and disappear into the familiarity of my headphone’s blare. This is a common ritual.  As I enter the chaotic environment of a Nicaraguan bus ride, I escape into the comfort of my music in order to avoid the stresses that accompany the journey. It wasn’t always this way.
When I first came to Nicaragua, I actively scrutinized every moment of my experience, allowing curiosity to flow from all my senses. I remember the initial bus rides were infused with the scent of elote (corn on the cob) sold by women with golden-laced teeth and frilly aprons. The smell of salted and buttered corn will forever trigger a cascade of sentiments with regards to my Peace Corps experience. I would take in the waves of green hills that floated by my tinted window like the images I used to explore as a child through my 1980’s View Finder.  The blasts of Ranchera music from the bus’s speakers were synchronized to this serene passing of nature.
            However, these days the plethora of sights, sounds and aromas that encompass Nicaragua are failing to diffuse as easily through my cultural membrane. In some ways this may signal that I have reached the peak of cultural adaptation and I have achieved integration. Yet, I cannot help but be saddened by the notion that in some ways to successfully assimilate into a different environment involves a trade off of experiences devoid of enlightenment and emotion. Nicaraguan life has become the norm, and thus I have stopped noticing this country’s intriguing nuances, which initially provided me with perspective and personal growth.
            As Peace Corps Volunteers, a large part of the job is to learn about our seemingly foreign settings. At first this poses perhaps immense physical and emotional challenges. Yet, regardless of our reactions, it is inevitable that we will be affected by our novel experiences. As service progresses cultural integration does not become easier, it only presents different obstacles. The longer we are in country and we become increasingly accustomed to our surroundings, the more difficult it is to absorb new knowledge. This struggle perhaps also causes us to shut ourselves off from attempting to learn more. It does not necessarily imply that there is nothing more to be attained, but rather one has to work harder to obtain greater edification.
As someone who constantly strives to advance my knowledge to learn more from diverse experiences, I admit that I am left frustrated at times by my increasing inability to absorb anything new from my surroundings. However, with 8 months left of service I am determined to take the necessary steps to unlock the rest of Nicaragua’s enigma. This will involve asking more questions and taking the time to actively listen to the responses. I’m relatively comfortable here, but that ease can act as a great impediment to advancement. I want to leave Nicaragua with unique memories and a greater understanding of not only myself, but the world of development, and a generation of youth that I personally believe has great potential for success. This can only be accomplished by pushing myself to constantly capture knowledge that is in my reach by striking a balance between how the experiences affect both my intellect and emotions. Awareness of this need is the first step to recovering Nicaragua’s cultural pieces of information that I may have missed along my journey.